Thursday, April 15, 2010
These guys are showing up in music videos lately. What's the deal? Are we forgiving them for our obesiity? How is Ronald Mcdonald even considered a romantic interest for the singer from Best Coast (honestly I love their music. Can't wait for an LP). I have proof that all fast food icons are possible date rapists. Really they should scoop up some Ed Hardy shirts and then the look is complete. No jury WOULDN'T convict.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Yesterday I went to Wrestlemania and ran a live tweeting session of the entire event and for your pleasure I've decided to post it here.
3:30 pm: "super jumbo cotton candy that is super and jumbo". Overheard from a super jumbo cotton candy salesman.
3:47 pm: The wrestler "Santino" appears to have a monster unibrow. Google it.
3:49 pm: A midget just kicked a few peoples ass. Maybe it was a dwarf but who gives a damn.
3:53 pm: They just opened the roof here. My buddy Donny has admitted he would hate his life.
3:58 pm: After I suggested wrestlmania had a comicon element Donny reminded me this is the "showcase of the immortals".
4:05 pm: Donny has now said fantasia wasn't good enough to sing "the star spangled banner" at wrestlemania. He wanted beyonce instead.
4:09 pm: Just realized I'm about to see "the Miz" from the real world wrestle. I am the most excited person in a crowd of 72k 2 watch
4:15 pm: MIZ WINS MIZ WINS!!!! Him and the big show remain tag team champs.
4:19 pm: Million dollar man has a son??? Oh yes and now I know who I'm rooting for on this match. #teamdibiase.
4:20 pm: It appears I'm In a minority for this match. These people don't know.
4:31 pm: The million dollar man's son just lost to a man I am to believe is tortured by mental illness. Randy Orton won.
4:34 pm: Eddie guerrero's wife is following his legacy. Maybe this means after she wins the championship she will die
4:36 pm: Wwwooooohhhh. Ladder match folks. Wait there's a Jamaican involved?? If he wins drug test that guy for ped's
4:55 pm: Lots of boos in the crowd as the "all american american" wins the money in the bank/ladder match.
4:58 pm: And they decided to reopen the roof at university of Phoenix stadium. Perhaps fan man will make an appearance.
5:05 pm: There's a Ginger wrestling??? Triple H please dominate this. Ginger's were born to be behind the scenes. Re: Ron Howard.
5:48 pm: Hitman v. Mcmahon. The 13 year rivalry that started at the "Montreal screwjob". I pray that the mean street posse comes.
5:52 pm: Mr. Mcmahon has the greatest swaggar of any person alive. I may try to mimic it myself.
6:06 pm: This match is like watching a snuff film. Kinda boring and we know it ends.
6:39 pm: My younger favorite chris Jericho with the fan upsetting win holds onto the title Long live the liontamer.
6:46 pm: Donny can't have another beer. He's about to buy another replica belt.
6:49 pm: Dear Batista. It's not very masculine to have a tattoo around your belly button. I'm just letting you know.
7:20 pm: Shawn Micheals v. Undertaker now. Supposedly if Shawn micheals loses he finally is allowed to retire at the age of 55 or so.
7:51 pm: Goodbye Shawn micheals. If it makes you feel better I just saw a grown man cry. Hope that helps.
Monday, March 8, 2010
THIS CHILD IS A MENACE!!! Don't be fooled by the fact that he is apparently 12 or something (I didn't do any research, Sorry! I don't want to end up on some internet watch list). However all I need to do is just listen to the testimony of Raaaaaaaandy, that sounded pretty damn cut and dry to me.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
Allright this lady is now officially not as bad as I believed. Charm, Wit, Grace these are not the qualities I attribute to Sandra Bullock often (typically annoying and frustrating). However, accepting an award for the Worst Performance of the year for her work in "All About Steve" in person at the Golden Raspberries is awesome and she did it with style. Bravo. Now about tonight, I wouldn't mind if you won Best Actresses since it was a boring year for good roles in the lead lady department.